The thoughts I have before a family holiday always seem to differ from the reality. The dreams of lying on a beach, having long lazy lunches and lie-ins don’t tend to happen, but looking back on our holiday I wouldn’t have changed a thing.
But, in the spirit of honesty, for a bit of a giggle and for something I’ll look back on when the girls don’t want to eat with us when their teenagers I thought I’d pen down a few dreams I always have of holidays but then the reality of actually being on holiday with two little ones…
Relaxing by the sea
The dream – They’re older now so you might be able to watch them from the sunbed for 5 minutes.
The reality – Don’t be ridiculous. You sit down, do a little dance that no one has noticed only for one or all three of the family to come and ask for something/get you to move.
The dream – Now they both sit at the table well we’ll be able to have nice family meals out.
The reality – When we think they’ll sit at the table we’re forgetting that Evie only sits there for the duration of her one course meal and by a meal I mean she’ll eat three mouthfuls before saying ‘no more’. Cue the husband and I eating in shifts as one of us runs after her as she sprints towards the marina.
The perfect resort
The dream – You go to a nice resort, everything is marble and white. It’s the perfect backdrop for photos
The reality – It’s a toddler accident waiting to happen. A slope made out of marble – perfect for a toddler perfecting her running skills. A sheer drop from restaurant to the bar – perfect for a toddler perfecting her jumping skills. Note to self. Buy toddler knee pads and a helmet for next year.
More time not spent in a darkened room
The dream – You’ll spend more time outside this year as one will sleep in the buggy and the other on a sunbed.
The reality – The toddler still needs to nap so instead of sitting in a dark room for 2 hours you spend those 2 hours pushing the buggy in the shade cursing anyone who makes too much noise.
The dream – Get nice family photos of everyone looking relaxed and dressed up nicely for evenings out.
The reality – The toddler either runs off every time, won’t be held or screams. You then forget after the first attempt and leave with one photo of the four of you where the toddler looks as though they have hated every moment of the holiday (she didn’t)!
Flying with kids
The dream – The flight will be so much easier this year with a three-year-old and perfectly packed flight bags with every activity they could desire.
The reality – The three-year-old is amazing, however the toddler decides she hates everything you have packed and wants to scream, run up and down the aisles and certainly has no plans to seat. LONGEST THREE HOURS OF OUR LIVES.
Reading a book
The dream – I’m going to read a book and a magazine this holiday.
The reality – The magazine was used as a toy on the plane to keep the toddler amused and is now no more. You have no idea where the book is as it’s under a pile of clothes and you don’t have time to read it anyway.
The dream – You buy a big inflatable and think it will provide hours of fun.
The reality – They loved it for a day and then it soon lost its novelty. It took the husband longer to inflate and deflate it!