Parenting

Second babies are… different.

August 29, 2017
I’m a Mummy of two. My toddler is three and my ‘baby’ is nearing the big milestone birthday, one. I really don’t know where that year has gone, it’s absolutely flown!

I was talking to another Mummy of two who has a similar age gap and we were giggling about the differences between our precious first borns and our seconds. There are definitely some clear differences that we noticed.
If you have more than one, how many of these do you relate to?
Childcare
 
When your first is born they are generally on the waiting list for the best, most expensive nursery in town, in fact I think I saw every single nursery within a 2 mile radius for Amelie. In the end we decided on a childminder but not after months of agonising over the decision, reading articles on childhood development and worrying about her going.
With our second my main consideration in her nursery choice is how I fit the drop off in with the toddlers pre-school and ideally not having to use the car to drop them both off. This leaves one nursery which she’ll probably go to (luckily it’s a very good nursery)!
 
Eating
 
With our first I pureed foods and had a freezer full of amazing meals for her to have everyday, she had the variety I never had as a child and ‘could have’ eaten well. Unfortunately she decided that she didn’t like food (other than at her childminders) and most of what I made was wasted.
Our second on the other hand has what Amelie has and if she is lucky has something pureed for her. Guess who the better eater is? The second.
 
Hygiene
Our first didn’t see dirt. Ever. If she touched anything remotely ‘dirty’ an anti-bacterial wipe would not only be used on her hands but her whole body. If she got ill I would look at all of the children she had seen recently and be really annoyed that I let her get poorly. 
I would never let her crawl when we were out, I mean, just imagine what could be on the floor!
Our second on the other hand now crawls and oh my goodness is it different. I sometimes catch her eating food from the floor I haven’t had a chance to pick up yet or that her sister has dropped, she ate a sticker from her sisters table the other day and today I caught her chewing a cardboard box. 
Oh and crawling when out. Yep. You guess it, she does it. With an older one to amuse as well it is impossible to keep her strapped into a buggy. 
When it comes to cleaning our second adventurer, a baby wipe does the same as an anti-bacterial wipe, right?
 
Park life
 
When you go to the park with your first you practically have reins on them to stop them from falling and micro manage their play time. You wouldn’t want them to fall, get dirty or go on something that is slightly out of their age range. 
With your second you wonder where they are and then see them coming down a toddler slide, head first.
Buying ‘stuff’
Our first had the coolest things, think matching plates, bowls and specially designed cutlery for every stage. Today I couldn’t find a spoon for my second so she had to eat her dinner from a calpol spoon!
The second also gets all the hand me downs. I’ve lost count of the amount of times Evie has worn clothes two or three times too big for her as I can’t find the next sized clothes or she doesn’t have enough for the season. 
A jigsaw or toy with key pieces is missing is also just as fun, isn’t it?!
It’s funny thinking about the ways we treated have treated our second compared to our first. On reflection our second is so happy, so confident and so chilled, so maybe, just maybe it isn’t all bad and  she’s benefitted from our more relaxed approach to parenting second time around.
How have you found parenting second time round? Have you noticed differences in the way you’ve parented your little ones?
Sarah x

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3 Comments

  • Reply Karen | TwoTinyHands September 8, 2017 at 6:52 am

    With my 2nd due very soon I’ll have the same age gap as your two. This post made me chuckle all the stuff you would t let your first do! Mine pretty much does all that now, there
    Is no hope for my 2nd, I’m not sure how I can get even more chillaxed about things! Lol

    ‪Thank you for linking up to the #familyfunlinky‬

  • Reply Crummy Mummy September 9, 2017 at 10:03 am

    As a mum of three I can tell you you get even more ‘relaxed’ with the third! #familyfunlinky

  • Reply Susie at This is me now September 11, 2017 at 12:59 pm

    Ah I’m due my second in January and so this is interesting! I have heard it’s all a lot more relaxed second time around. I’m considering less puree definitely. And now i’m a SAHM I don’t think I’ll be thinking about childcare, at least not until it’s two. #FamilyFun

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